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I farted and someone said: “bless you”.
383 upvotes
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I asked the doctor what the fleshy sponge-like matter was that he was extracting from my ear.
381 upvotes
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My new pet kitten hasn’t ate or drank in two days, I’m worried she may not survive.
381 upvotes
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i kick the chair and take my final breath.
381 upvotes
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Everyone always told me I looked like my father but they never understood my anger over this
380 upvotes
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When I was a lad, my father told me that if a man consumes the beating heart of an infant upon the eve of every solstice, he shall remain young for all eternity.
379 upvotes
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Sandra watched her son swinging in the playground
378 upvotes
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I am searching for my wife's killer
377 upvotes
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My wife is too sweet...
377 upvotes
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I was furious with my wife when our baby came out black.
377 upvotes
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I farted and someone said: “bless you”.
383
--
10
9
8
7
6
5
4
3
2
1
0
I asked the doctor what the fleshy sponge-like matter was that he was extracting from my ear.
381
--
10
9
8
7
6
5
4
3
2
1
0
My new pet kitten hasn’t ate or drank in two days, I’m worried she may not survive.
381
--
10
9
8
7
6
5
4
3
2
1
0
i kick the chair and take my final breath.
381
--
10
9
8
7
6
5
4
3
2
1
0
Everyone always told me I looked like my father but they never understood my anger over this
380
--
10
9
8
7
6
5
4
3
2
1
0
When I was a lad, my father told me that if a man consumes the beating heart of an infant upon the eve of every solstice, he shall remain young for all eternity.
379
--
10
9
8
7
6
5
4
3
2
1
0
Sandra watched her son swinging in the playground
378
--
10
9
8
7
6
5
4
3
2
1
0
I am searching for my wife's killer
377
--
10
9
8
7
6
5
4
3
2
1
0
My wife is too sweet...
377
--
10
9
8
7
6
5
4
3
2
1
0
I was furious with my wife when our baby came out black.
377
--
10
9
8
7
6
5
4
3
2
1
0
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